INTRO

Untold lives of woman, is a woman's journey on the path life has set her on.
A blog about factors that affect the lives of women and where you can find inspiration.
The Un edited side of "life ".Where there is beauty in imperfection and knowing that through the support and wisdom we share with each other .We will help improve not only our own lives but the lives of generations to come.

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Monday, January 23, 2017

I HAVE NOWHERE ELSE TO GO

DONT CLING TO A MISTAKE BECAUSE YOU SPENT A LOT OF TIME MAKING IT.


Listening to a conversation by a lady who decided to become complacent with the physical ,verbal and emotional trauma from her spouse and her giving reasons as to why she stayed in a toxic and draining relationship made me sick to my stomach so I write this to show women who use "I have no where else to go," as an excuse that it's time for you to want better for yourself.


Women feel trapped in relationships of domestic abuse. For  reasons like a pastor told her that God hates divorce, her partner said he would change, she did not have a place to go and money to survive once she left, she thought love conquered all, she felt alone , what would she do with the kids or just the fact that she has given so much to the relationship that she would rather stay than leave.
The limitations of leaving can be both psychological and physical. Many rationalise their situation. Some end up blaming themselves for the abusive behaviour of their partners and try convince themselves if they approach the person differently, maybe they won’t be abused.

Being in an toxic relationship is like an addiction “The person being abused is focused on the positive and waiting for the next positive. The fact that a person can be so loving in one moment and cruel the next makes you doubt that they don't mean it and as women we tend to see the good in the people we love and end up suffering for it.The psychological effect the moments of tenderness and intimacy are unpredictable, but they are so intense and fulfilling that the you end up staying in the hopes that a moment like that will happen again. Almost like selective amnesia you forget the bad in order to hope for the moments of intense love and acts of grandeur.
 (see my post on learn to live ,  dont agree to bercome a statistic  ,starting over )

Eventually you become both physically mentally and emotionally worn down and continue to tolerate more abuse.  Over time you end up feeling less entitled to safety, to love, to happiness like you do not deserve it.

The thing is a-woman-is-unstopable-once-she-realises she deserves better .When you get so used to being unhappy you begin to think it's normal. While in reality it is Not normal. Nobody is created to stay miserable. It is the wrong decisions we continue to make after a mistake that leave us broken.

Everyone goes through bad things you can either let that define you or you can learn to move on having learnt from the situation.

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Wednesday, January 11, 2017

WHEN ONE DOOR CLOSES GOD OPENS ANOTHER

WHO I AM IS A REFLECTION OF WHAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH AND PUSHED ON

Have you been at a point in your life,Where everything that could possibly go wrong. Does go wrong. And it feels like you literally go through an earth quake and you have to start from scratch putting the pieces back together again. With no clue on where to start.

Where you feel like your so far down the bottom of the hole that you can't dig any deeper and you have no choice but to dig your self out.
I have lived through it and looking back at the time that it felt Iike i had hit rock bottom. I am glad I found the strength to crawl out of the hole I had found myself in
No doubt with the help of God Almighty. Because when you have no where else to turn he is always there and for of us. A lot of us only seek him out when we are at our lowest point. The beauty is he will never leave us nor forsake us. He is always there  waiting on us to seek him out.

Looking back at my life and remembering those times .I am nolonger filled with anger, rage or sadness .I look back and am glad I went through all that I did. It has made me a better person and I wouldn't change a thing. The beauty of life is that it's one big lesson after the other with the hand of God guiding you along the way.

In life, I have found that the people who have gone through the worst situations imaginable, are the people with the biggest hearts and the most to offer in life. If you have not been through something you can't say you have seen the hands of God,and that is Where Great things are moulded.